I’ve kept journals on and off throughout my life, but I’ve never held onto any of them along the way. Instead, I have a box of memories, from my teenage years mostly. I did rip out a few journal entries and put them in there, but as for the rest of the journal, I always felt it was safer in the trash!
The box has lots of letters–you know the kind we would pass in class or in the halls–and lots of pictures. I’ve saved certain movie stubs and concert tickets. I am even guilty of saving certain mixed tapes from the many boys I was head-over-heels “in love” with during that era of my life.
When I read MamaKat’s Writers Workshop prompt about our teenage diary entries, I immediately thought about this one note in particular that I DID NOT intend, or want, to keep. For some reason, my mom held onto this note. She thought it was charming and that I’d appreciate it one day. I thought–and still do on some level–that it was nauseating.
The note was from this boy named Alan. He was an odd ‘fella! I don’t normally call boys “fellas” but this kid dressed, looked, and acted like a ‘fella at the young age of 13. He was always gawking at me, always finding a reason to choose me for his team in gym class or to be his lab partner. He was very quiet, polite and studious. I don’t remember him participating in sports, or having have many friends. For some reason, I remember that he always brought the teacher exquisitely wrapped gifts for the holidays that you knew his “Momma” had her hand in. You know – that sorta boy.
Anyway, I remember walking to my desk one day and seeing a folded note on the floor with my name scribbled on it. I picked it up, not knowing what to expect, and read it. While I don’t have it in front of me, I can tell you that it went something like this:
My Dearest Chrissy:
I am a catalog freak. I love looking through them and reading them. I can’t get enough of them. But I love you more and I would give up catalogs if you would go out with me.
Yours Forever, Alan
I remember looking around to see if Alan was watching my reaction. I remember looking to make sure that no one saw the note–I didn’t want people to think that this self-proposed freak was my boyfriend. I mostly remember wanting to vomit. What the heck was a “catalog freak??” anyway! I remember running home and trying to burn the note–I guess my mom took it along the way.
And, you know what? 15+ years & one son later–I find that note “charming” in an innocent way.
Most 13 year old boys, even when I was 13, are more concerned about feeling girls up then reading magazines, catalogs none-the-less. And, boy did that ‘fella have guts??
I can only hope that Buckaroo will grow up to be a kind, polite and studious boy. And I am glad that the only thing he likes to do with catalogs is to cut them to shreds.
{ 3 comments… read them below or add one }
They were probably Victoria's Secret and Fredrick's of Hollywood catalogs and figured the 3D version would be much better! LOL
Hey, he was hot for you at 13. I remember in second grade slipping the boy who sat next to me a note that said, "I love you. Do you love me?" He wrote back, "Are you crazy?" I was crushed! lol
That is great!
Glad your mom kept it!