I caught this great idea on an airing of Live with Regis & Kelly a few months ago. Kelly was talking about how one of her childrens’ teachers suggested a polite way for the kids to ask one another to stop doing things that bothered them. For instance, it would be a whole lot nicer for little Suzie to tell little Johnny, “it bugs me when you kick the back of my chair, and I wish you kept your feet on the floor” as opposed to screaming “stop kicking my chair you meanie!”
We all know the saying “you catch more bee’s with honey.” But it really is amazing how choosing the right words can get you what you want.
Maybe I should try it sometime…
To Buckaroo: It bugs me when you snort your snot back down your throat, and I wish you’d just go blow your nose.
To Miss Mac: It bugs me when I open up my eyeshadow to find tiny nail imprints in it, and I wish you’d enjoy using your fake stuff.
To both of my kids: It bugs me that you want a snack every five minutes, and I wish you’d just finish your (insert most recent meal here.)
To those with opinions about how I discipline my whiny kids online at the grocery store: It bugs me that you share your unsolicited opinion with me, and I wish you’d just mind your own business.
To those who complain about the jobs that volunteers do: It bugs me that you have the nerve to share your opinion and I wish you’d get off your a$$ and help once in a while instead of sharing it.
To the girl up the street who speeds past my house and gives me the finger while I motion for her to slow down: It bugs me that you are a disrespectful, rude, self-centered, wreckless b!t^h and I wish you’d just slow down.
Oh, and here’s one last “universal” one….
It bugs me that you act like your $hit doesn’t stink, and I wish you’d just take a sniff the next time you are in the bathroom.
Gosh darn-it, that felt good. Try it yourself.
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