Originally posted on February 4, 2009

Buckaroo has a new random saying to add to his usual, “Hi. I am 4. I had 3 birthdays. One at Chuck E Cheese, one at school, and one in my backyard.” Yesterday was the first time he previewed his new saying in public. I’ll set the scene for you…

Miss Mac had her two-year old well visit yesterday, and one of my favorite people, who happens to be the mom of an ex-boyfriend, works there. Buckaroo adores her, and every time we go to the doctors, she makes a special trip into our room to visit with us. I am really surprised that she still likes me because I was really horrible to her son in the end. I like to think that in her heart, she knew our relationship just wasn’t gonna work, which is why she chooses to still be so sweet to me. Buckaroo knows her so well that he doesn’t feel the need to give her his usual random birthday speech, so instead opted for something new…

“When I get older, I am not going to leave like my Daddy.”

Yup. He just had to say that to the ex-boyfriends mom, who I am sure somewhere deep down in her heart must hold some sort of little grudge against me for how I treated her son, and was probably thinking “Ha! In your face!”

I jumped in and said, “He means that he won’t go to work.” Phew.

My hubby is usually around the house so much because, as a teacher, he is home most days by 2:30pm, but for the last three months, he has been coaching his winter sport and leaves the house at night for practice or meets. His “absence” must be bothering Buckaroo because it’s all he talks about lately. (”Absence” because my hubby is more “present” than most other husbands I know!) My children are so spoiled to have him around so much!

But, even though I knew what he meant, it was still so embarassing. I am sure this will not be the last time he catches me off guard with that one…

Originally posted on August 24, 2009

While driving to the seamstress today, I spotted a young driver in the minivan behind me. He clearly had his permit–hands tightly at “10 and 2,” all eyes on the road with his mom perched in the passengers seat. As I stared in my rearview mirror, I took note of how young he looked. My eyes welled up as it occurred to me that in a little over 10 years, that will be me, and Buckaroo will be the driver.

As I drove along I thought about how fast the last 10 years has gone, and how fast, sadly, the next 10 will fly. For some reason, I could not shake the image of the boy behind the wheel.

To my shock, as I walked into the Seamstress, there stood in front of me the young permit driver and his mother. I immediately had chills run throughout my body as I fought my tears.

Why did this coincidence stir up such emotions inside me, you ask? For starters, I just finished reading the book, When God Winks, by SQuire Rushnell, which is about the power of coincidences, or “God Winks,” and how they guide your life. For quite some time now, I have been fighting an inner struggle of spirituality vs. religion, searching for my own beliefs. I fell in love with this book, and the concept of coincidences being cosmic “winks” from God.

For me, seeing is believing. The book forced me to think about some coincidences in my own life and how they were, in fact, from a higher power telling me that things would be okay, or that I was on the right path. I feel that the wink I got at the Seamstress today was God’s way of telling me that there is truth in the theory and that I have no reason to doubt him.

The fact that this wink came today was also astounding to me. I have been at my wits end with Buckaroo lately and last night it all came to a head. I told my husband that I felt like he only hears me when I yell, which gets more frequent by the day, and that I don’t like the person that I am becoming. I blame his age, his independent nature, the natural desire to “test” your parents, the hot summer filled with non-stop fun, and even my own tolerance level on the rough patches. My husband assured me that no one said parenting was easy and that, despite this rough patch, Buckaroo is a great kid all due to our parenting.

The wink made me realize that the next 10 years are going to fly by and that even though Buckaroo has been testing me lately, he’ll never be 5 years old again and that there is enjoyment in even the rough patches if you look for it. Before I know it, he’ll be 15! So, I need to take the time to enjoy every stage because I can’t get them back.

That wink was the pat on the back that I so needed to remind me that I am on the right path with parenting.

Originally posted on August 11, 2009

I had a massive temper tantrum today. Yes–you read that right–I, the mom, the CEO, had a huge 30-second temper tantrum inside my car in the Costco parking lot. It’s the first time I really ever “lost it” in front of my kids, and boy do I feel t-e-r-r-i-b-l-e right now!

I am loud talker by nature–but screaming, eyes bulging out of my head, fist clenching, freaking the you-know-what out, well, I can’t say I have ever done that in front of my kids before.

Both of my kids have fully given up their naps, and yet neither are going to bed or waking up at reasonable times. They have started that natural sibling fighting with one another, and whining more often then not for everything, and about anything, under the sun. Between the swimming, the beach, the playdates, the ice pops, and all of the other “extras” that summer brings, they are simply exhausted. And so is Mommy.

I am sure that I am not the only mom who has lost her $h!t in front of her kids, and I am sure this won’t be my last time. It just sucks. I felt sad, they felt sad, and so through all of the yelling and crying, things were only made worse.

When we got home, we all went for a time out. Buckaroo in his bed, Miss Mac in hers, and me on the couch. I sat there in silence and thought long and hard about discipline, and respect, and mindfulness.

Why do my kids listen only after I’ve yelled, but not the ten times I said the exact same things in a calm, caring manner? Why do I have to look like the bad guy all of the time? Why do I have to rely on threats and bribes to get by? I really do want to raise strong-minded opinionated yet compassionate children, but why is it that they only seem to be whiny, persistent pains in the tooshie lately? I like giving them chances so that they understand that there are consequences for their actions, but is parenting in a 3-strikes-and-you’re-out method sending the wrong impression?

I am new to this. This being “CEO” of my house. I have never raised a 2 1/2 year old and a 5 year old before. Sometimes I wonder if going back to work is the answer, but then I get sad to think about leaving my kids and letting someone else teach them their life lessons. I didn’t push them out of my vajayjay to only hand the gloves over and let someone else do the rest of the hard work!

I guess all that’s left is to learn from my mistakes. We all have bad days, right? RIGHT? I’ll apologize to my kids, and I’ll let them know that I am sad about how our day went down. I’ll ask for their forgiveness and I’ll tell them that I do not want to feel this way again.

Oh boy, I could really use an instruction manual right about now…..

If you’re not “pinning,” you’re not “winning.”
Here are my 5 favorite Pin’s of the week…

1.  I’m in LOVE with this entire look - the Starbucks included! That seafoamish green is one of my favorite colors and I feel like its the perfect accent to the neutrals.  Too bad the jeans cost $1850 alone.  Maybe I’ll have to head to the mall and do a fashion haul based on this outfit to make it more DaddyMac-friendly, wallet wise that is!

2.  I can’t wait to make these yogurt covered strawberries!  Yum, yum!

3.  Two of my kids favorite meals in one? I’ve gotta wonder if they’d actually eat it, though?

4.  I LOVE how easy it is to take pics with my iPhone but I’m not sold on it’s quality.  I’d really love to get my hands on this olloclip for better picture quality!  Valentines Day??  Hint Hint.

5.  Every. Single. Thing. about this picture below is SO true for me. Especially the ice cream!

Are you on Pinterest?  If so, follow me and I’ll be sure to follow you back!

Originally posted on January 8th, 2010

I can’t pass through the check-out at the grocery store without grabbing a magazine. My heart pitter-pats to read about the random happenings of those who constantly keep us guessing (you know, the ones who whine that they have no privacy.) I am so drawn to guessing whose cellulite is exposed on the front page, so curious as to who is cheating on whom, and eager see what, in fact, my favorite celebs look like without makeup. I don’t normally go for magazines that provide anything beneficial, such as those boasting new recipes or ways to get killer abs. It’s the trash that I go for. In the blink of an eye, I’ll spend $5 just to get my fix.

This week, though, the latest issue of Cosmopolitan is what caught my attention–a magazine I haven’t read since my early 20′s. I did a double take when reading the lower left headline on the cover & knew instantly that I needed to buy it.

It read:  ”Your Hoo-Ha Handbook: Get a Healthy, Sexy Vagina.”

I wasn’t aware there was anything “sexy” about a vagina. Nor that there could possibly be ways to increase it’s “sexiness.” Truth be told, I didn’t purchase it to learn how to beautify my vajayjay. I bought it because I could not resist seeing if it was a real article that someone was actually paid to write.

The three-page spread shared “15 bits of info to boost your V-Zone comfort level” from everything to an anatomy lesson to, ahem, decoding it’s odor. I’ll do the honors and share some of my favorites with you.

Did you know…your vadge (as they so eloquently refer to it) will not “revirginize” if you’ve gone through a dry spell. My goodness, thanks for clearing that up. 

Did you know…things can’t get lost up there ’cause it’s not “a black hole.” Phew! Thanks for the clarification.

and Did you know…you can actually pay for a “designer vagina!” On the high end of the scale, you can blow $7,000 for vaginal rejuvenation. This type of procedure is aimed for tightening your vadge. Can’t afford that? $1,500 will buy you “The G-Shot,” a collagen boost down there that’ll last you three to six months. Decisions, decisions, decisions…

Despite my utter amusement with this Hoo-Ha Handbook, nothing would ever convince me to blow $5 on Cosmo again.

Originally posted on February 4th, 2010

To the Parents of Max & Ruby:

While it’s refreshing to see that you trust your little bunnies enough to let them make their own decisions, cook their own food, discipline one another, and solve problems on their own, I often wonder where the heck you are.

I felt compelled to fill you in on a few things that you don’t get to see because, well, you are never home.

Ruby is such a bossy little girl, that I often find myself defending Max out of pitty. She barely lets him make his own decisions or play what he wants. Everything always needs to go her way! I understand that as the older sibling, we have this maternal nature that subconsciously forces us to rule the roost, but every now and then Ruby needs to be told to knock it off. My son recently told my daughter that he was the boss of her, just like Ruby is the boss of Max. I told him to knock it off.

Max, on the other hand, is rather annoying. Sure, he doesn’t use naughty language and never yells to express his anger towards his bossy sister. Instead he just ignores her and continues doing what he wants. I consider that somewhat defiant.

Did you know that your little bunnies often stroll around town and even hop on the bus without telling you? My kids watch in awe as Ruby & Max get to do all sorts of fun stuff without the control of Mom and Dad. It’s hard to explain why it’s ok for your kids but not mine.

Lastly, I want to ask you what city you live in. In my neck of the woods, if I let my kids provide for themselves around the clock, DYFS would have a field day. Don’t get me wrong; I really don’t judge you. There are days that I would like to lay in bed watching talk shows and soap operas all day while my kids fend for themselves. Maybe if I move to the land of absent parents this would not frowned upon and I, too, would get a well-needed break.  So, really….where do you live?  Maybe we can be friends.

Please advise,
Buckaroo & Miss Mac’s Mommy

I’ve been following “What the F*CK Facts” on twitter for a while now.  Every day, I’m humored, and even sometimes shocked, by several “facts” that are revealed, so much that I’ve found myself mentally compiling my own list of WTF Facts that only another mom could relate to.

So, I present to you…..“Mom’s WTF Facts: An Ongoing List”

* It takes HOURS to clean and organize a playroom, and less than 5 minutes for it to be utterly destroyed beyond recongition.  WTF!

* It’s inevitable that after you scrub your toilets and wipe the piss stains off the wall that someone will literally $hit on your work seconds later. WTF!

* When find yourself kid-less for the night, your sleeping hours will consist of heartburn, insomnia, or ridiculously loud snoring from your spouse as opposed to a night of uniterrupted sleep. WTF!

* No matter how many times you unload your kitchen sink, every time you walk by it new {& barely dirty} items will be in it. WTF!

* Same thing goes for the laundry basket. WTF!

* If your kids pick their nose & eat their findings, it may actually strengthen their immune system. WTF!

* The day you succumb to the stains on your kitchen floor and spend your only free time on your hands and knees making it shine is the day that juice will be split on it.  WTF!

* Kids will lie about the silliest things:  Yes, I pooped today–No, I’m not tired–Yes, I let the dog out.  By the end of the day, you’re left with a constipated, exhausted kid and a pile of dog shit in the playroom. WTF!

Got anything to add to my list?  Feel free to leave your mom-appreciated WTF Fact in the comments below & I’ll add it to my on-going list along with a link back to your blog or twitter handle. 

Valentines Day is around the corner, and I’m turning to Elmer’s to help me show some love to a few special people in my life.  During the holiday season, I put together the unique scrapbook frame below using Elmer’s Memory Keeping items as a gift for my mom.

I enjoy the idea and look of scrapbooks, but can never seem to find enough time to devote to the hobby, so doing small projects like this frame is the perfect way for me to get that scrapbooking fix on a short amount of time.  I decided to put together a few small gift baskets with all of the Elmer’s Memory Keeping items & supplies needed for my sisters to make their own Valentine’s Scrapbook Frames.

A quick visit to my local Walmart is all it took to load up on the supplies needed.  In the Elmer’s Memory Keeping aisle, I purchased the Craftbond Dual Tip Flexible Pen, Craftbond Double-Sided Scrapbooking tape, Craftbond Glitter Glue 3-Pack, and X-ACTO Decorative Edge Scissors.  I then browsed Walmart to grab the rest of my supplies including some 5×7 frames and and adorable foam heart die-cuts that I used to dress the outside of each gift.  {See more about my shop at Walmart here.}

To start, I laid out all of the supplies and used the frames to position everything together, prominently displaying the Elmer’s Memory Keeping items.  Using clear wrap and ribbon, I packaged the gift up and adored the foam heart on the outside.

Affordable at less than $15 for an entire DIY personalized gift, here is a look at the final product:

This shop has been compensated as part of a social shopper insights study for Collective Bias.
#CBias.  All opinions are my own.

There are nights when I am so desperately exhausted but can’t turn off my mind enough to gingerly doze off into a peaceful nights sleep. Usually this happens when I’ve got lots of big ideas bouncing around inside my brain.  A brainstorm at it’s best–the thoughts as loud as thunder, the images as bright as lightening.

I’m sure you can relate.

It’s nights like these that I can still hear my mom telling the childhood me to get out my rosary beads and recite my prayers.  As a child, that often worked.  The monotony of those hymns always relaxed my mind enough to break away from the thunder and lightening.

As an adult, however, I’ve come up with something different that always works for me.  I thought I’d share it with you for those nights when you can’t shut off your brainstorm.

I recite my ABC’s…

Because it’s usually these nights that I can’t stop thinking of my to-do list, or things in the future, I force myself to think of only the things that happened that day.  I start with the letter A and work my way through the alphabet recognizing all of the moments throughout my day–big and small.  Sometimes I just go through the alphabet and list the people I am thankful for having apart of my life.  Sometimes I even go through the alphabet and list my favorite indulgences, like Chocolates!

This game forces me to stay in the “now” and not get too far ahead especially at the end of a long day when all I really want, and need, is a good nights sleep so that I can tackle whatever comes my way the next day.